kill or cure...

so, having spent another sleepless night due to the current illness, I decided to stay home and go to the doctor to make sure I don't have SARS, HIV, rabies or some other dreadful malady. I was surprised I was able to get an appointment on such short notice. I went there at 1:30 this afternoon and was greeted by a receptionist who had that "gee, you look like shit..." look on her face, masked by a practiced smile. I told her my name, doled out my co-pay and sat down as far away from everyone else in the waiting room as possible. I just picked up a magazine when the door to the office area opened and a nice you lady called my name. I did a quick eye scan around the waiting room to see how many dirty looks I was getting for being tended to so quickly, but everyone sort of had the same look on their face as the receptionist. I think they were relieved to have me out of their company.
I was shown to an examination room and waited till the doctor came in. He asked how I was feeling, but I think he could tell. He immediately looked in my ears and down my throat and asked how long I've had these symptoms, I told him since Friday. He then took a swab on a pair of long tongs and stuck it down my throat, which made me gag.
"What's that for?" I asked.
"I'm going to send it away. I think you have a bacterial infection in your sinus system."
I wonder just to where they send stuff like that away. I also wonder who spent 4 years in college to spend all day locked in a lab, making cultures out of throat swabs...
"Do you think it's serious?" I then asked
"Better safe than sorry. There's a lot of stuff going around these days."
Stuff going around... There was some stuff going around London about 1348. There was stuff going around the Ebola River valley about twenty years ago, too. I'm kind of interested in what stuff may be going around these days... hopefully it's just some usual stuff and nothing too exotic.
He wrote me a prescription, told me to eat handfuls of Tylenol for the fever and pain in my throat and ears and drink plenty of fluids.
You don't get too much for you ten dollar co-pay these days, I guess.
I left, drove to the drug store and stood in line behind an elderly woman who was told that her pills would be ready in about three hours. She sighed and left. I handed my prescription to the gentleman, who read it and said,
"Wait right here, I'll have this in ten minutes."
By now I have come to these conclusions:
1. I must look like hell and I'm scaring everyone who sees me.
2. I have something the doctor and pharmacist recognize that needs immediate treatment.
3. I'm getting nervous about all of this.
The pharmacist was back in five minutes with a bottle of pills. I paid for them and left the store. When I got in the car I took a good look at myself in the rearview mirror. I have black circles under my eyes, which are all watery and red. My hair is sticking up all over the place. My skin is sort of an off gray color, and, what I think was the clincher, my cross earring has somehow turned itself upside down. I look like some sort of deranged heretic. I have to remember this look the next time go someplace where service is usually slow...
When I got home, I read the bottle of pills for the instructions.
"Take one tablet every day."
There are ten tablets, so, let's see... they should last ten days...
The bottle also has these nice little yellow warning stickers on it:
"MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS. ALCOHOL MAY INTENSIFY EFFECT. USE CARE USING MACHINES."
"TAKE THIS MEDICATION WITH PLENTY OF WATER."
"NO ANTACIDS, IRON, VITAMINS, MINERALS WITHIN 8 HOURS BEFORE OF 4 HOURS AFTER TAKING THIS MEDICATION."
"MAY CAUSE DIZZINESS."
"DO NOT USE IF PREGNANT OR SUSPECT YOU ARE PREGNANT OR ARE BREAST FEEDING."
I think I can ignore the last one, but the rest are scaring the crap out of me... I had plans to stay awake all night, drinking and using various sorts of machinery, while suffusing myself in vitamin and mineral concoctions as I chew handfuls of Tums and stand near the edge of a high place...
maybe I'll feed some breasts, if I can find some that are hungry, just to round the evening out.
The drug, by the way, is AVELOX, 400mg. Click on the name to find out more. I'm sorry I did...
Oh, well. So much for the latest malady. I hope you're feeling better than I am right now.
Maybe more later, if I can't sleep.
Oh, yeah, I never made it to Kaiju Big Battel, but my daughter and her friend took the tickets and went, they had a blast. Damn.
Guess I'll have to wait until next time.
later.