the further decline...
of western civilization, part 35...
I'm sitting here, surfing the net whilst watching a college basketball game and a commercial came on that really made my balls hurt; It's a commercial for BMW automobiles, starts out with some woman in a parking garage climbing up on a garbage can to adjust a security camera. Then it moves inside to a series of little vignettes of this business suit clad, hair pulled back into a severe bun loser taking every opportunity to hang out at the water cooler so she can peek in the windows of the security office to look at her fucking car on the security video monitors. And, to top it off, it's USED! Oh, pardon me, BMW, previously owned... good jumpin' jesus on a stick, what the fuck? Do people really swoon and moon over their damned cars like that? Have I been missing out on something all my long, obviously unfulfilled life? I don't recall any car ever giving me a hard on like that dizzy broad had over her's. Don't get me wrong, I've owned vehicles that I was really, really fond of, like my '39 Packard Hearse and my '67 VW pop-top camper, but I managed to keep my undies dry and I sure as hell didn't stand there all day staring at them. I guess it's the same deal as these guys who just have to drive Hummers and Mercedes and pickup trucks that you could haul the Titanic up a boat ramp with, just because it says, "HEY, LOOK AT ME! I'M A MAN!". Nope, you're just some insecure asshole with good credit. One of these days when I see one of these manly types getting out of their 'Vette or their jacked up SUV in a parking lot, I'm going over to him, shake his hand and tell him what an honor it is to meet someone who's fucking dick is so small that they had to buy something like that to make up for it. Think they'll get the joke?
Our society (note: word used very, very loosely here...) is most definitely going to shit, friends. How much better would it be if people doted over their fellow human's plight as they do over their cars? I don't know anyone who would take half of what a car payment would be and donate it to a charity once a month, but they'll take their three or four hundred a month and throw it down the rat hole so they can feel good about themselves. Fuckin' party on, Wayne...
Well, I'm gonna go smoke a cigarette outside and stare at my eight year old car and my wife's seven year old car...
later, citizens...
pearls before swine...