2.24.2010

55...



I've been told that I am probably clinically addicted to Lorazepam, an anti-depressent.
The same was said about my use of Percocet, an acetaminophen and oxycodone based pain drug, which I've been eating like candy to contend with the constant pain of the bothersome, inoperable cyst in my left kidney.
I know I cannot continue to function like this, although, I must say that the vapor like world I currently inhabit is quite comfy and fuzzy and nice. Some of the negative symptoms of these addictions are not so nice, though, so I've decided to start weaning myself off said chemicals, which promises to be a long and unpleasant experience from what I've been able to read on the interwebs. Some of the experiences I've read about, particularly involving Lorazepam, include myriad uncomfortable physical symptoms, night terrors and something called "end of times syndrome". I have no idea what that is, but if it involves lots of ranting and raving and hiding under beds and such, it might actually liven up things around Stately Sad Old Goth Manor® for a while. I wonder if this is a good time to try to kick the cigarette habit as well? Maybe not.
So, it's off to hide all the sharp, pointy things and see what happens. This is going to take weeks, maybe months. Might be good blog fodder, I can record all the sordid details as I sink further and further into reality...
Later.





spew accordingly below...


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7 Comments:

Blogger Teresa said...

Whew - good luck getting rid of all that with (very hopefully) lesser side effects.

4:07 PM  
Blogger joated said...

Good luck to you, my friend. I don't imagine it will be easy but it will be worth it.

4:08 PM  
Blogger Mr. Bingley said...

Me and Dr. Balvenie are here!

7:07 AM  
Anonymous majorfactor said...

I have never heard of Lorazepam so when I looked it up
☠ Holy Edgar Allen Poe ☠
Tread softly my friend

9:11 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

Good luck! Had to kick the Lorazepam myself a while back - it is hard but doable. What saved me was having my cats and wonderful spouse around - maybe a good excuse to get a kitten :-)

10:07 PM  
Blogger Howlsatmoon said...

I have the Lorazepam for a bit of PTSD. If I'm going into a high stress environment, I'll pop a half millie and all is right with the world.

You gave me a very good head's up gift there.....been doing this for years, couple times a week.

Thanks, and keep strong. You'll beat it.

1:21 PM  
Anonymous Lynne said...

Gregor - good luck but it sounds like you have the most necessary ingredient: intent. As for smoking, if quitting is something you want to do, I highly recommend a $14 book called The Easy Way to Quit Smoking by Allen Carr. Changed my mindset entirely. I smoked 1 to 2 packs a day for 30 years. Tried hypnosis, cold turkey, nicotine gum, patches, you name it. Even quit once for two years. But as soon as I got done with that book I quit for good. Happily. Withdrawal was nowhere near as scary as I'd imagined because I embraced each pang as a sign I was closer to freedom. It's been two years and a month today and I can't even imagine picking up the habit again.

7:01 PM  

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